The Power of Emotion
I had an interesting conversation with my sister this morning...She was telling me of a recent telephone conversation she was having with one of her friends when suddenly all the lights went out in her kitchen with a loud ZAP. After checking for blown fuses, bulbs or other obvious signs of a problem, she decided to call an electrician to investigate. To make a long story short, there was no problem with the electrical circuits in her home. So she was left with the frustrating experience of feeling like an idiot when the electrician came in and threw the same switch she had several times before, only to have the lights magically flick back on.
My first question..."What were you and your friend talking about when the lights went out?" She answered she had been sharing her thoughts about a new romantic relationship and felt the presence of our mother having an influence over the situation. " Well that's easy," I said, "The electrical surge was mom...she's just letting you know that you are on the right track." Well knowing me as she does, she was completely unfazed at my suggestion that our dead mother was communicating with her via electrical disturbances. As a matter of fact, she seemed comforted by the thought of being given our mothers "stamp of approval" for her new beau.
They were very distant in life, and this experience made her feel a closeness to her that was absent while my mother was alive. She was always distressed over the "feeling" of not being close to our mother, so this was a very healing moment for her. Now she speaks with excitement when we talk about mom, rather than the usual sadness that has plagued her for years. Was the electrical disturbance created by the unseen energies of our mother? Who knows, who cares? But the mere suggestion that it might have been comforted her with the feeling of being watched over...and loved. That is all that really matters.
Our bodies communicate with us through feeling the power of our emotions. Maybe not quite as flashy as an electrical surge, but it has been known to happen. You've heard of spontaneous combustion I assume...but that is going way off topic. For now, let us just consider the power of our emotions and the effect they have on our bodies and minds. Just as the feel good emotions of love have the power to heal, so to do the energies of anger have the power create pain and illness.
Everyone experiences the normal growing pains of life every now and then. But when pain becomes chronic, it is a clear message from our bodies that there is an internal struggle demanding our attention. The goings on around us provides many of the clues we tend to overlook when we are in the throes of distress, but they are all there if we broaden our perspective a little. Stress of any kind is the number one catalyst to awakening all of those sneaky little demons just waiting for an opportunity to come bubbling to the surface. It is our job to pay close attention to them when they do.
Developing an acute awareness of our surrounding stimuli, be it physical or mental, is essential in order to effectively navigate the unpredictable terrain of our emotions. The energy generated by them is where our personal power lies. If you dump your trash in somebody else's yard you can be certain it will blow right back into yours. Managing emotions intelligently is the key to well being...of mind and body. When we are not "in touch" with our feelings, it is impossible to see things clearly. We become very narrow-minded and do not see the forest through the trees.
Communicating effectively with others also becomes very challenging , as we tend to lose sight of how we are feeling. We start blaming others for our perils, instead of looking in the mirror and asking ourselves why we feel the way we do. Sure, maybe your boss yelled at you and made you feel crummy. I agree that feeling stinks, but if you dig a little deeper, you will realize his yelling at you is his inability to effectively handle his own emotions. Having that awareness allows you to remain in control over how it effects you so you don't take on his pain. It all rolls downhill right?
Maybe his boss yelled at him and now he's looking for an outlet. Tag, you're it. Instead of feeding into it by fanning the flames, try a bit of compassion. Perhaps you could say," I'm sorry you are so upset, what can I do to help fix this?" That way you have completely taken away his power to transfer that energy on to your emotional circuits in a futile attempt to make himself feel better. Now he is responsible for managing his own stress and you don't take it home with you.
Having compassion is not an easy thing to do when you are faced with the angry output of another, but a little bit goes a long way. If you take on the garbage, you will "feel" it right down to your core, and most likely use somebody else as a dumping zone...quite possibly yourself. Then the cycle of pain continues. But if you leave his office and all the emotional baggage behind you, I guarantee you will sleep and feel better than he will. Remember, you have the power to choose...Make a wise choice! Added bonus... smile when you leave...Who knows, he may even appreciate you more in the morning:)
Blessings,
Cyndi
